Family soup
‘Family soup’ blog article was written by Pat Jewell, Program Manager, Parenting and Early Years Program at Australian Childhood Foundation.
In a Bringing Up Great Kids parent group, one father shared his idea that being in a family is like being part of a family soup, where each will have its own ingredients that make it so special and individual. The analogy is a powerful one with many possible applications.
Harmony Week is a time to celebrate inclusivity, respect, and belonging. It’s an opportunity to reflect on how different cultural backgrounds, traditions, and values shape our families and communities.
When you bring your family story to a new family with other family stories, there is an art to creating a new soup. Some ingredients do not go well with others, and some need to be adapted to work harmoniously.
Just like in cooking, achieving the right balance is key. Some ingredients naturally complement each other, while others may require adjustments to work in harmony.
Messages that shape our families
When exploring the Bringing Up Great Kids program concepts with families, we often encounter situations where families are “stuck” in a myth or belief about how the world was and should be. These beliefs come from family, school, community, or through marketing and media. This place of being “stuck” can affect parent and caregiver relationships with their children, often without the family even realising what is going on.
Messages are always mixed; some are more powerful than others, some are embracing and empowering, and others are demoralising and hurtful. Harmony Week is a chance to reflect on these messages and to consider which ones should be kept, adapted, or left behind in order to foster a sense of inclusion and belonging.
Examples of empowering messages include:
- “We respect and value all cultures.”
- “Our differences make us stronger.”
- “You are loved and accepted for who you are.”
- “Kindness and understanding create a better world.”
On the other hand, some messages may need to be reconsidered:
- “We only associate with people like us.”
- “Different is wrong.”
- “You have to change to fit in.”
By recognising and understanding these messages, parents and caregivers can create a family culture that embraces diversity and fosters belonging.
Creating your own family soup for harmony
By recognising and understanding that these messages exist, parents and caregivers can make informed choices about them. As in the analogy of the family soup, which of your messages is essential to your family? Which messages empower and nurture you? Which ones are better left out in order to create a more inclusive and supportive environment?
Harmony Week offers an excellent opportunity to actively shape the messages we pass on to children. Here are some ways families can celebrate and ensure their “family soup” reflects values of inclusivity and respect:
- Share cultural stories – Encourage family members to talk about their cultural backgrounds, traditions, and experiences.
- Cook a meal together – Choose a dish from a different culture and discuss its significance.
- Learn a new tradition – Explore cultural customs, music, or art from different backgrounds.
- Encourage open conversations – Create a safe space for family members to ask questions, share feelings, and discuss diversity.
- Reflect on family values – Consider what messages you want to pass down and how they align with the principles of Harmony Week.
A recipe for an inclusive future
Families play a crucial role in shaping the next generation’s attitudes toward diversity and inclusion. By intentionally choosing the messages we embrace and the traditions we celebrate, we create a family environment where everyone feels valued and accepted.
The beauty of a family soup is that it is never set in stone – it can always be adapted and improved. So, as you reflect on your family soup, ask yourself what ingredients will you keep? What new flavors will you introduce? And how will you make sure your family soup is rich with harmony, respect, and belonging for all?
Happy Harmony Week!
Discover the Bringing Up Great Kids (BUGK) Program
Bringing Up Great Kids (BUGK) is an integrated suite of activities and tools that are unique and offer all parents and carers a fresh way to understand and enact relationships with their children. It focuses on building positive and nurturing relationships between parents and their children, while also aiming to support parents to review and enhance their patterns of communication with their children to promote more respectful interactions and encourage the development of children’s positive self-identity.